It has been half a year – and a lot has been learnt, yet a lot has changed. This post might seem a bit emo or not too upbeat for some people.
As I said, I was leaving Year 6 to go to a new school. Let me summarise it in 1 word – Chaos. I’ve lost lots of my friends. 2 of them are on the opposite side of the year group. The other 2 arent in my classes. I don’t to talk to them anymore. Not because I don’t want to, but because I cannot. I have new ‘friends’, but this is not the same. All my teachers are different – some are very nice, some pull the life out of me in lessons. In such a big school, there will always be people praying for your downfall, there are ones trying to cause it. There are people who hate any sort of competition, acting as if getting 1st in a race with no one but you is something to celebrate. Some subjects you will love, maybe because of the teachers. The constant class changes keep you on your toes. You may never have the same teachers. There will be falling out, drifting apart, finding out that your old friends have new ones. Feeling a sort of envy and sadness because you can’t find new friends, and your old one have already excluded you from your life. I remember the days when me and my friends could just walk and talk at break and not have a care in the world. No stress of fitting in, no stress of going to random teachers’ classrooms while sacrificing your break. No constant worry that soemone is plotting for you, when all you want to do is fit in, be perfect, not be the red in a pool full of greens, not the introvert who has no social skills and will never have friends. Yet, this is what I looked forward to. In year 6 I said so many times ‘I wanna go to year 7 already’. I want to go back. My school have just done our sets – a way of organising classes based on your intelligence. That is blatant discrimination disguised as help. Pushing you to the limit. And some children cannot handle it. They leave school and go to a different one or become homeschooled. Because of the constant fear that you are doing something wrong. I know a friend that got bullied because of her weight. I didn’t know what fat shaming was at the time, so she taught me – with patience. Which is precisely what schools are not doing. I legitimately have 4 teachers that keep me genuinely sane – My Tutor, English teacher and My history teacher teacher. I will lose 2 of them after this half term. Try explaining this to a Y4 that their teacher is not going to be in their class anymore. What if it is a teacher that has helped them so much? Imagine how they would feel. One more thing – I hate the exams there. 1 child in my class flaunts about his scores, and if anyone else gets more than him he either accuses them of cheating ,even though we’ve all seen him cheat, or (if they usually score high), they scream at them to shut up all the time, and tell them to stop bragging. That is all.
